By Diana Morais
Consciousness Coach

A woman should only be in a relationship with a man that makes her feel like she is the best woman in the world and vice versa. No man should be in a relationship with a woman who degrades him. However, some of us chose romantic partners based on the person’s background, on his/her style, or if he/she has a successful career.

If you have watched the movie “HER”, you’ve probably realized that we are not distant from a reality of having a programmed consciousness fulfill our selfish ego and immature needs. Actually, we don’t even have to go that far: our dogs can play that role in our lives so we don’t have to deal with another human being.

Love is a choice and being in a genuine relationship requires effort. So we ought to spend time choosing the characteristics of the person we want to build a life together with (or not). Defining the character and personality we want by our side is the only way to stop kissing frogs and go straight to “Prince Charming”.

A survey done in Brazil last month showed that 68% of men think that women wearing shorts and cleavage are asking to be molested. Women were astonished with the male answer and now think that it is time to organize a campaign for harassment awareness. Nothing justifies the attitude of an abuser, but women are responsible for the survey’s result. The answer was not a consequence of the size of the skirt we’re wearing. Instead, it was a clear message that we need have more self-respect. Understanding and recognizing our physical and metaphysical natures is the first step.

Every woman wants to be emotionally taken care of, but nowadays we try to compete with men in every aspect. Men, on the other hand, end up using women for the fear of being used. Adidas recently made a sexualized shirt for the 2014 World Cup in Brazil that said “Lookin’ to score” with a cartoon woman wearing a bikini. Purely accidental that women are being seen (and treated) as objects, or does that soccer shirt represent what has become the common male and female behavior for the sake of not being alone?

It is beautiful what women have accomplished throughout history in most countries: successful careers, financial independence, healthy kids and homes to call our own. But we can manage to have all that by still nourishing our feminine perception, bringing more harmony and joy to the world. That’s what the planet needs, after all, and it is what will make men behave more like men and less like stubborn children looking for a mom’s replacement.

Nonetheless, we can also choose to carry on living fake relationships where there is no mutual respect. In the eyes of others and in the lies we tell ourselves, it is bad with him but worse without him. Metaphysically it is all disrespect, which is the effect we’ll have in any relationship we have – be that a friendly or a romantic one.

Every woman is exaggerated and every man is silly, but it is the interaction of both sexes that creates a balanced reality, where one is helping the other reach his/her best potential all the time. So we need to exercise and learn with relationships instead of interacting with the movie we have in our heads of how the person should be and try to “fix” him/her. In the end, it’s about choosing yourself and who you want to be all the time. Moreover, it is an exercise of learning how to become a better version of yourself compared to how you were 10 years ago or five minutes ago.

Change now and live a different reality.